#that wasn't a weird deep statement what I mean is that as of recent I could eat a full meal then still feel hungry after whats up w that

[belladonnafleur]

🌸

[alatismeni-theitsa]

Madeline Miller has every right to write books like "Circe" and draw inspiration from Greek mythology but sometimes I want what she smokes... Like, I can't believe that with her studies and experience she looked at one of the most beloved heroes of the Greeks for millennia and she went "the gods are 'sociopathic narcissists' in our modern standards, Odysseus is full of himself and probably shittier than he presents himself to be because patriarchy".

I am mostly paraphrasing, and the quotes are below. Yes, Greek societies have been patriarchal for a long time, yes Odysseus is the main narrator so of course, we see the story from his point of view, yes he is a trickster character and not perfect, no that doesn't automatically make him a bad person who overshadows other characters so he can elevate himself. If he had lied or hid something when he narrated his story, it would be there in the text, as in every other occasion Odysseus tricked someone.

I find it very hard to accept that with her Classics background she characterized the Greek gods in such a simple way, letting out all their magnificence, generosity, and kindness.

I understand what she wants to say here but the phrasing is weird. What do you mean by "push back" against the mythology? This makes it seem like her works are equal to the mythology texts and she is able to "push back". (She says in the article that her works are not equal to the Homeric pieces, but phrases like this makes it seem so)

These statements of the interviewer don't help much either... In a formal article, please don't characterize gods of other cultures and religions as "stupid" and similar things. You wouldn't call a person that in such a context, and you call the Greek gods stupid? Also... we are so sorry for our hero who tells his own story, I guess?? And sorry that our important ancient texts made you sad as a kid???

This statement alone might not seem like much but in the general spirit of the article, it adds up to the notion of Odysseus isn't that deserving after all and we should stop giving him that much attention in the name of social justice. For example, later in the article, we meet this statement from Miller. (I understand she doesn't outright call Odysseus a narcissist and what she says is that there is some material on the text she can use to play with this theme.)

The whole piece might leave the impression to a portion of readers that Odysseus wasn't actually that great and was praised in the context of a patriarchal society because he was a male hero. I can't help but feel this removes some agency from the Greek people who have kept Odysseus in their hearts and tradition for thousands of years, up to this day.

I analyze her and the writers of multiple articles stance exactly as deep and with the same stretches as the article writers praise Miller's work. She made the powerful witch Circe a rape victim and Odysseus a liar from a few hints (not even) in the original text. And I cannot meta-analyze her work from a cultural, intersectional scope? Yes, "it's not that deep" but since the articles are making a fuss out of a singular recent book and analyze it to death, I believe I am allowed to go a bit deeper in my commentary.

So, their stances remind me of the old theme of the "enlightened, educated foreigner" who "knows better" the native heroes than the natives of a land and sees how "problematic" the culture and the heroes themselves are, and the culture wasn't "feminist enough" to give the female heroes voices.

It all ties to the sense of ownership the West has with the Greek myths and characters. This is a formal interview/article and yet they talk about the heroes like they are their cousins or like they discuss in a bar about heroes of their own culture. One says that the Greek gods are essentially pricks and the other moans because we mostly follow Odysseus in... "Odyssey", as if the text came out yesterday in their local newspaper.

Like, I thought we would get a respectful and serious approach from people who know what they are talking about, but apparently, I was too optimistic.

The funny thing is, while misogyny was/is a thing, it's not because of the lack of feminism that Circe wasn't so important. She was merely the "bad witch" of the story. As it often happens in folk adventure stories, side characters - bad witches included - don't have a deep background story. To claim that the misogyny of Greeks was the reason Circe didn't get much "screentime" in another hero's story (!!!) is a stretch. There are multiple male characters in Odyssey who don't get that much time because they are side characters.

I can't believe I am saying this but... Miller and the writers of the articles give me so many "white feminism" vibes. Greece societies had/has issues with women's representation and yet they chose one side female character who matters as much as the male side characters in the text and go "now THIS is a problem we need to talk about for the next five years! We will do the subversion of the century and we will open people's eyes to neglected women by making a beloved hero a prick!! Oh, also Circe is now a rape victim to show how cruel the men were back then!"

Here is the full article. Most of it is pleasant and insightful and then there are... these statements that made red flags arise in my mind. I am not saying that Madeline Miller is trash, or that she doesn't know anything, or that she deserves any type of harassment. I just think some commentary is needed when such proclamations of hers are published and end up adopted by many who don't have the time to cross-reference.

[trashiewrites]

Promotion (Soap x Reader)

Word count: 2319

[Notes: I'm so happy to finally have finished this fic! I've been feeling on and off for a while. I hope you all enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it! Also sorry I have really basic grammar so grammar might be shit.]

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Night lurked over the head of the men and women of the camp. You found yourself looking up to the sky for no particular reason. The stars of tonight shined brightly, they seemed almost hypnotic. You were out of it to not hear someone come by behind you. "Sky beautiful tonight ain't it?" You jumped up at the sudden voice, knowing it was the captain "sorry, didn't mean to scare ya!"

"It's fine captain...." you lightly chucked as splashes of red-tinted your cheeks. You've had a small feeling for the Scottish man. You've been denying it till recently. He's your CO but you know... at least shoot your shot. "Would you like to join me, captain?"

"I would love too" he sat down close next to you. A lovely grin from ear to ear as he stared at the stars too. "What do you see or get reminded of when you see the stars?" You hummed, placing a finger upon your chin as you thought. For a split second, you glanced at the captain...

"Well..." your heart raced at the thought of putting the notation of you liking someone out there. In the end, you chicken out of it. " I see possibilities! What about you sir?"

"They remind me of someone I deeply love." He chuckled as his gaze faced downward. "They don't quite know it yet though..."

"Whoever it is, they should count themselves lucky, sir." You nudged his shoulder, attempting to keep your cool, "you're an amazing person after all!"

"You really think so?" Soap laughed as he rubbed the back of his neck. You nodded, giving him a reassuring smile. Though your chest showed this pang of jealousy. "Say... how about we head to the mess hall? Grab some dinner."

"Of course!" You yelped a tad too excitedly. Realizing that fact you tensed up and smiled nervously "um... Of course, captain..." the both of you stood and began to walk side to side. The walk itself was sweet and littered with small talk about anything. It could be training, people, or even gossip. Yet throughout the whole time you would glance over to the captain. Noticing small little details about him that made your heart slowly melt. His chiseled jaw, his deep blue eyes, the way he laughed and made others motivated. You loved every single thing about this man.

"I wonder what crap they'll give us today.." He held the tent's drapes open for you. "You first~" he mockingly bowed.

"Why thank you, captain!" You walk in after a small curtsy.

"You know you can call me John right? It's off-hours, so I don't mind." You paused in your tracks, processing the offer. You knew no one who ever called the Captain by his first. If anything you found the idea almost disrespectful to him.

"Are you sure sir?" You look at him with a look of pure confusion. He covered his mouth as a laugh leaked from it. Which by all means makes you even more confused.

"Yes, I'm sure. But just on off-hours, ya hear?" He smiled, lightly pushing your shoulder as he walked past you.

"Y-yes, sir!" You both went up getting your MREs. On the side, they had a package of tea bags, the water next to it respectfully. As well there is a brewer with a sign that reads coffee. You, being much more a tea person, gladly took a plastic cup and had your cup. John, on the other hand, had pure black coffee. As you sat down facing each other you could help but notice the stars in his eyes as he glanced at the coffee. If anything it was drop-dead adorable. As you both waited for the MREs to prepare themselves you decided to push what john told you earlier. "So John..." you coughed, hoping to release some on the nerves. He hummed back glancing down at you as he sipped his cup of dirty beans.

"Something on your mind (y/n)?"

"About that person, you talked about earlier. It-the one you love, can I ask more about them?" You glanced down, waiting to get scolded that it wasn't your place to know.

"Sure!"

"Sir, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked it definitely isn't-" you headshot to look at John as you realized the words that exited his mouth. "W-wait... really?"

"I mean, why not?" He smiled ever so innocently, "do you not want to know anymore?"

"It's not that... I just thought that's not really my place." You flash him a nervous smile as well a shrug of your shoulders. "But go on!" Your tone was almost eager, your heart yearned to hear this.

"Well.. she's a beautiful lass. Very strong-willed and kind." His face began to soften, you assume at the thought of the girl. "She just splendid to be around. She's smart, witty, and exceptional clueless..." he chuckled, facing off to the side.

"Do I know her?" You took a bit of your MRE. Which, by the way, was still piping hot. "Hot hot hot!!" You lightly banged the table as you swallowed through the pain. John smiled as he placed a hand upon his chin, pondering the question.

"I suppose you do, they are on the team." This caught you by surprise. You knew this person, and you trained with this person. The thought plagued your mind. Unaware of it, you were eerily silent as a checklist played through your head. John coughed, having taken bites from his meal, "look, you don't have to look further into it but if you do find out, I'll give you a promotion of sorts."

"A promotion? For something like this?"

"You'll see.." John smiled as he took his final bite. "Now I best be off, good luck." He stood, walking away from the table. Leaving you staring into the distance, dumbfounded. As you finished you knew that the other boys were up much later. Roach, for example, the man stays up all the time. Speed walking over to the barracks to see Roach outside on his phone.

"Gary! I have to ask you something!" He looked up and smiled sweetly.

"Sure! What could you need this late though?"

"Apparently the captain like one of the girls, do you have any idea who?" You spoke quietly as to not draw anyone else's attention. Roach was baffled at first at the weird question. Yet that baffled face soon became one that reads 'you can't be serious'.

"You are blind..."

"What do you mean?" You began to think it should be an obvious answer. But there are plenty of women as John described.

"Look... I don't know the captain personally enough to know for sure. But it's been kinda obvious for a while." Roach chuckled as his eyes returned to his phone, "I don't even think I have the balls to tell ya. How 'bout ask the lieutenant? He knows the captain like the back of his hand."

"Lieutenant Riley? Ghost? Do you know how weird that is? At least me and you, ya know, we are the same rank." You clutched your fist together, chills running down your spine at the thought.

"If I tell you, you probably, no, you WILL go ask the lieutenant anyways."

"Just tell me, Sanderson!" You grabbed the man, who is taller than you, by the collar of his shirt.

"It's you dumbass!" You stood there in silence. Some say your soul exited your body for a minute. Roach slowly moved your hands off his collar. "(Y/n)??"

"You're joking..." Roach shook his head. "Where is the lieutenant?"

"In the living quarter last I checked." Roach meekly voiced out, scared to once again get his collar grabbed. You walked in to see the lieutenant relaxing in the lounge area, his head in a newspaper. You quietly made your way over, as well as thinking of what the hell you would ask him. You found it painfully awkward to ask if your CO has a crush on you.

"You need something (y/n)?" He lowered his newspaper ever so slightly, his brown eyes staring coldly at you.

"Uh... y-yes I-I have a... question." You stared right back to him, the heat on your cheeks making you uncomfortable as hell.  He chuckled as he took one last look at his paper, folding it neatly. You could help but think did he already know you were coming here? I mean it wouldn't be surprising, due to the confrontation with Roach.

"Well, go ahead then. Ask away."  His  voice  seemed to mock you, not rudely of course. But it's as if he was teasing you.

"W-well sir, earlier this evening the captain g-gave me a challenge to... to.." you coughed the lump of nervousness in your throat was suffocating. As you once again open your mouth to speak the rest of your statement, Riley's deep voice chimed in.

"He dared you to find out who's he's crushing on, ya?" Your heart sunk down to your stomach. Of course he already knew... you feel the heat on your cheeks.

"Y-yes, sir... gosh this is embarrassing." You faced the ground, glancing up periodically.

"Well I'm assuming you want me to tell you who?"

"W-well sir, I originally asked Roach and well..." you coughed, trying your hardest to grow some balls, "He said it was me. I was just wonder if it t-true."

"I'll tell you two things alright?" You nodded as you took a seat across from him "one, he does. It's been quite obvious for a while. Two, he never shuts the fuck up about you.. god it comes to the point I hate being in a room alone with him."

"O-oh I-I"

"Just hurry up and get together already, that way he stops fucking going on about ya" you nodded did a 180 headed straight off.

"Y-Yes sir!!"

Just after, you sat at your bunk... you couldnt bring yourself to do it. Your mind was still processing it all in. Lieutenant Riley's word echoed in your ears. You yourself felt like you were floating, yet scared. "This must all be a dream, it too good to be true..." you pinched you arm, almost to the point of drawing blood. Eyes squint from the pain, and open to the same scenery as before. "What am I doing?" You stood and went to the mirror, slapping your cheeks. Squeezing your face together ever so slightly, "get yourself together (y/n), this could be the once chance!" You confidently went to the door. "Captain quarters are far... it shouldnt be difficult at all." You walked out briskly, closing the door quietly behind you.

You made steady pace to the captain quarters. You tried your hardest to keep your cool, you werent sure if it was working. Then again, it's rather late there really isnt many people around. You stood in front of the door. You have never been more scared of a door before.  You took a step forward, a deep breath, curling your hand to knock of the door. Before you could even knock the door opened and there stood the captain. "Oh (y/n), what got you out here so late at night?"

"I-I just N-needed..." your body shivered of nervousness, of course he would open the door right before you were ready!

"Look at you..." he spoke softly, grasping lightly at your shoulder. Placing another hand in the open air. "You're shivering like a you've been in the cold for awhile, come in." He slowly leads you in, even if you were at all cold (which you weren't) the heat from your face could probably keep you alive. You look up to him offering a cup of hot tea.

"Captain... I-im not cold..." you took the cup, taking in the aroma of the tea. "but I do appreciate the drink." It was calming actually.

"If you ain't cold, does that mean you're nervous? By what in god name has god cha nervous?" You place the tea upon the coffee table. You knew he was staring at you, yet you could stare back. Rubbing your arm shyly, a small cough to clear your throat. "Oh.... it's that challenge ain't it?"

You nodded, slowly lifting your head to see him. His expression was almost eager, perhaps hopeful? He held his own hands, twiddling with his own thumb. "C-Captain..."

"Please... Call me John." It was almost as he was begging just like a puppy. It took you by surprise but it's what you could atleast do.

"Okay, John," you chuckled. Cracking a small little smirk, butterflies already flying everywhere within you. "I-I like you too, I have for a while. Gosh, saying "like" is just an understatement. I've loved you for a while." You exhaled deeply, the weight in your chest seemingly lifted. John stood, sitting next to you. Wrapping you into a tight embrace.

"Congrats, (y/n). Are you ready for that promotion?" He spoke softly into your ear. Hunger, yearning plagued the tones of his voice.

"J-John what exactly is this promotion?" You moved his head back, cupping his cheeks. He smirked devilishly, slowly moving to cover your own cheeks.

"Well, of course. You're gonna be promoted to my girlfriend~" as he finished his sentence in a deep husky voice. He planted his lips upon yours, holding you close. It was heavenly, you didnt want it to end. His taste was hypnotic, sweet, hungry and full of passion and love. Time seemed to slow down and you couldnt care. Yet reality hit back always too soon. You two separate panting, staring longingly into eachothers eyes. "G-God I waited so long to do that..."

You panted quietly, holding your hand to his cheek. You sat and admired this moment, this moment will never happen again. "Well... I hope the wait was worth it." You laughed, pulling his head closer. Gifting him a small peck upon his nose.

"Oh definitely princess, definitely."

[sunareii]

wc: 2773

suna grits his teeth, the light's too strong for him to see. he close his eyes shut, having no intentions to torture his eyes at the glow infront of him that is brighter as his mothers cellphone brightness. a deafening sound screeches at his ears like metal scratching another metal, oh how annoying that sound is.

he squints his eyes slightly as if his default eyes wasn't squinted enough. he could see a person, a female he assumes by their figure alone whose back faced towards him but the luminescence made his sight blur, he couldn't identify who it is

voice echoed insignificantly, he doesn't know whose is it nor where it's coming from except the voice started to scratch him in the head displeasingly

rintarou! rintarou! rintarou!

sunas eyes blinks open once to be greeted by his mother scowling after he has bestir himself from a horrible dream. he could hear a small voice saying 'oh no' inside his head as it's definetely not the first time he woke up to an angry face

"do you have any idea what time it is?" his mother barked, her face continues to grimace at her son. suna sits up groggily and reached for his phone beside him

12:47 pm

"how many times to i have to tell you to not stay up late!" she berates before pulling his cushion up, causing him to fall a bit from his stance and gets hit with it

"ow─! you just hit me with a pillow!" suna winces, strands of his dark hair are all over the place

"better than a slipper or your face would look even worse than just messy hair" the mother threatens before leaving the territtory so casually like she had not scolded anything at his sons ears. senzo could only choke a laugh at the freaky scene that occured upon his room, he had identified his apathetic relative as a fellow who would only shrug their shoulders when being rebuked or insulted. suna is infact a 'take no shit' kind of man, he's just wholesomely a bit playful with his mother.

suna goes down the stairs slothfully as his body might not be running his blood yet and he took a bit too long to go to the dining room where his food rests on the table cold as a corpse

"if you have woken up ealier it would have been warmer" his mothers interrupts from the living room. suna rolls his eyes then sneers  at his mother from the room

'i wasn't even complaining but i am now' he thought as he opens the large plate that covers his meal, his boiled eggs as soggy as ever

he sits down at the at the table then started contemplating about his recent dream, was it even a dream? though it seems a bit vague but vivid when he was still in a slumber. suna reckons it was just another weird hallucination. he has quite plenty of those so this one is no special, except that this peculiar reverie didnt have any sort of plot unlike the time he dreamt about the miyas and some random player from karasuno that he'd only seen once have a bachelors party at a couple he had seen in a movie before while also drinking blue liquid which now is extremely questionable but that was just an example of the long list

suna hears a soft thump going down the stairs, he glance to see his cousin all dressed up for the day

"hey sen, are you going somewhere?"

"uh.. yeah, why?"

"can i go with you?"

"sure..."

senzo probably didn't sound sure himself, well that's because he isn't used to people wanting to join him to go outside or anything at all and he was receiving a small friendly treatment from a cousin he didn't knew existed and vice versa.

the two went out briefly after suna changing into some proper clothing for the day, the walk is quiet like the usual though they do give some comments here and ther. the sun sweltered upon them while two or three clouds wafts against each other.

"im going this way, is there a place you wanted to go?" senzo asks after an abrupt stop

suna truthfully didn't have a particular destination, he went with him 'cause he felt like it. they went far for him to just go back, he thought for a long minute before a specific location passes in his head.

"yes, actually

"i'll see ya later then" senzo says before walking away

suna felt awkward since his destination is far from where they had gone to

he doesn't know why he's making his way there, for fresh air? for the scenery? for someone?

suna halts as he sees a narrow space in the side of the hill, he figured it's also a path way up to the old patio he visited. he begins walking upwards and repents at his decision mid-way. the path is rocky and hard to stay still on because of the numerous inconsistent rock shapes. it doesn't help that there's a hot atmosphere around him as he continues to go up carefully.

sweat drips down his forehead, his tiny strands of bangs sticking along on it. the heat annoyed him as he reaches the top of the mountain hill, the sun beams directly at the crest where he now stands but once he finished catching his breath the brightest star seems to appear infront of him.

somehow the fieriness of this evening─the reason he's such a sweaty mess─suna doesn't seem to mind it anymore as he watches the the girl he had came across twice stand infront of him. she was there, like she had always been, tossing a ball over her head for who knows how long.

'wait, she does volleyball?'

i mean, he could see it but at the same time not so much?

though you were tad bit taller for an average height of a female and you don't look like you hold any outstanding physical attributes either but he can't really underestimate you that quickly can he?

sunas being remained unnoticed due to her keeping her concentration firmly. she tosses the ball up into the air, patently going to do a jump serve. from her evident zealousness you would be tricked that she'll actually spike or even jump with experience. she was slow and her legs looked stiff when she leaped, hell, she didn't even swing her arms in time, she barely even touched the ball.

'uhh.. that was an awkward serve' her attempt to serve was futile and funny even, suna can't help but to chortle instead of detaining it, his attempt to be discreet wasn't great either. she let's out a light gasp as soon as she heard him cackling from the side, she already was embarrassed at her shot but now that the same cute boy she saved from the market is a witness at her own frustration made her embarrassment go off the line than where it should be

"that was an impressive serve you just did" suna starts sarcastically whilst disturbingly taking little steps towards her. she could only scream her embarrassment deep on her palm, peeking her eyes through one of the gaps to see him, picking up the ball from the ground.

"how long have you been here?"

"long enough to see eveything"

"pleas erase it from your memory" she says blatantly as she finally regains her composure, suna shrugs at her as he hands the ball back to her, she unhesitatingly grabbing it back only for him to extend his arm up. the ball being too high for her too reach since the boy teasing her is intimidatingly tall.

"it's not that easy" suna replies as he looks down at the figure shorter than him giving him an irratating frown, "what do you know about volleyball?" she mumbles, her eyes looking elsewhere.

"alot of things" he remarks with a heavy stare. the girl infront of him  seems surprised and asked "do you play?" which he answers with a curt nod. the silence after that is conscious and creates a long stare-down between the two, in addition to that is the beating heat of the sun baking them from below like they weren't perspiring enough from the exercise they had done in such a time.

"i'll just take this back then" she says as her feet tip-toes close to his level, the tip of her fingers hardly brushing off the ball. suna just stands there leisurely as he watches the girl he doesn't even know struggle into obtaining her property back.

suna gazes down at her meek nature, her cheeks faintly glows a pretty shade of pink, her hair  cascading down her neck every now and then, the sun rays paints her skin too perfectly

suna smiles slightly as he pokes a little fun with her and having fun himself except to the part where he begins to feel her chest nudging his whenever she jumps and immidietly gave her her ball back smoothly. "here" he says before walking away from his agitation

she cocks an eyebrow at him when she turns around to face his retreating figure, his phone buzzed at his pocket, opening it to get a message from his mom and the second years groupchat, well maybe third years for noow on. yet suna couldn't be bothered to open either of them seeing as his mom just texted him some chores whilst the groupchat is just filled with the twins nonsense.

"could you play with me for a little while?" she asks reluctantly, dugging her nails on the air-filled ball

suna is bewildered at the instantaneous request but he figured it's better to take up on her behest than do his mothers errands anyway

turning his heel back, he meets her big eyes with his flat slanted ones and his actions seems to answer her offer

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"what made you think playing straight under the sun was a great idea?" suna complains, panting heavily as the sun eventually plummets down. they stayed up on top for hours and instead of actually playing suna ended up teaching her the basics of volleyball for goodness sake she was an extremely slow learner.

"what do you mean? i like it up here" her tone filled with confusion as she questions him

"the sun literally fried us"

"you don't look that good to me"

"huh?" suna's brain is now all muddled by her statement causing him to give a repulsive look, she didn't seem too bothered by how she voiced her proclamation and only started walking down the stairs, suna following behind.

"you must be thirsty, i'll buy us some drinks, my treat" she announces as she holds out her baby blue colored wallet, turning left as they reached down the stairs, the vending machine is conveniently there aswell. "any preference?" she inquires only for suna to shook his head

"water is enough" he answers shortly

their drinks clank down at the bottom of the machinary and some gulping could be heard subseuquently. suna exhales lowly after drinking some refreshment. the wind passes and gives a cold whisk ontop of their skin, the sky is painted deep orange along with pale red. they soon walk in silence with the cold bottles, hers being a can of juice in their hands.

"can we play again?" she unexpectedly mutters shyly

suna glances at her, the tip of her ears turning incredibly red. "don't you have your own friends?" he mentions as he takes another sip. "i know quite a few people but only one or two are actually my friends and neither of them plays volleyball" she explains with her eyes shut

"if you're that wishful to learn the sport why not join your school volleyball club?"

she groans "i can't, my father doesn't let me join any after school activities"

"why?" sounding invasive only crossed his mind once she gave him an answer

"my dad is very strict, i need to be home before five he says" she mocks her father at the end of her sentence in a playful intention

"you're already pass your curfew, you child"

"you look the same age as me though"

"oh really?" they banter and it felt like they have known each other by a relatively long time. he enjoys her company it's fairly not too solemn and to him it feels nice to have a friendly jest with someone who won't intend to cause any issues unlike some two other people..

the usual tranquil in every interaction seem to be becoming consistent and recurring, they soon throw their bottles away in the trash bin sitting down the street like any other decent person

"so can we play again?" she asks the second time with a little more anticipation

suna didn't answer and only looks at her emotionlessly. does he really want to? she was nice but she's rather tenacious, there was a moment where he wanted to leave during the whole session. it seems the longer he stayed quiet, the more she  became impatient

"come on! the guys who plays at the public court always looks intimadating"

"and i'm not?" he snickers while his eyebrow rose

"well, i didn't have the ideal impression of you at first though but now you seem like a cool guy" she explains giving him a small thumbs up

"do you mean when you rescued me in the market?"

"no, earlier than that" suna thinks for a moment to the point of looking up on the dark sky before the memory finally getting into his head

"oh, you mean the birdnest hair? yeah i remember now" he teases with a little smile

"it's not like you looked any better with your own hair at the time"

"so─!" she starts a little louder than her monotonious voice before smiling at him keenly exactly how she eyed him the last time they met "how about it city boy!"

suna sighs and scrunched his nose at the nickname, he presumes because of his unfamiliar dialect "you're that persistent, and why city boy?"

"i never got your name after all this time, you know" nor did he ever got her name

suna looks down for a moment, he couldn't fathom what is wrong with him just telling her his name, it's not like he won't get hers when he answers.

"suna rintarou" he replies blankly

"suna rintarou?" she says questioningly, he nods his head

"suna rintarou... suna rintarou" she repeats in a breathy whisper as if engraving his name in her mind

"l/n y/n" she introduces herself back, "nice to meet you, suna" suna didn't reply much and only says "likewise" back and continuous the conversation where they have left just before the introduction.

suna rests his hand in his pocket, "you seem too willing to hang out with someone you only met thrice"

"i like you anyway so it's fine!" she beams a little too bluntly and it didn't help how she closed the proximity between them, literally doesn't intend to let him go off the question.

"sure"  he mouthed rather than openly saying it

"what?"

"i said i'll think about it" he claims as he turns his back to her to turn on the side of the sidewalks, "see you! you should know by now where to find me if you ever want to see me" she emphasized, waving her hands at him which suna imitated briefly before disappearing to her sight completely.

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"curse you gate!"

the door slides open revealing her father staring at her expectantly waiting for her with his arms crossed just rught after she got inside the platform

"what's your excuse this time?" he awaits, his finger tapping his forearm

y/n stops her foot on the soft muck as she faces her humble abode. she struggles to open the gate as quietly as possibly but the damned steel gate really wanted her caught, huh?

"i.. was playing volleyball.." she says with all honesty as she step infront of the doorstep

"alone again?" his father assumes, he doesn't understand why she keeps sneaking out outside just to be doing things all by herself

"nope, with a newly found friend this time" y/n murmurs as she takes off her shoes before entering her home nonchalantly. she wouldn't mind getting in trouble for the day and her father takes note of her uplifted mood quizzically

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taglist (open!); @akaaaashit​ @sredamancy​

[anonymoushouseplantfan]

ugh, i know i'm in the minor-ist minority here, but i feel so sad about/for harry, like deep in my heart. i honestly don't think he's a bad guy. has he acted like an absolute ass? yep, no excuse. but for some reason, maybe it really is the lingering spell of his PR, i can't bring myself to believe he's, well, bad. maybe i'm a sucker, but i don't sense bad in him, moreso, immaturity. i don't agree with his recent doings, but i do think meghan brought out the worst in him for us to see. (1)

f anything, i weirdly sense a badness with meghan herself. of course, not the fairytale "badness," moreso a weird darkness to her. i haven't been able to shake this feeling about her since day one, literally. harry is fully responsible for his actions, both past and present, but i cannot shake the feeling that meghan has somewhat created this man we are seeing these past years. it's as if she took all of his worse and weak qualities, and aided in constructing this idiotic behavior. (2)

maybe this is coming from a personal place. i have been the victim of a narc - not romantically - platonically. but, she made me someone, who looking back, i do not like. it wasn't to the extreme with harry, but i did become, pettier? unempathetic? cold? and this was all towards people i had established friendships/relationships with. and it was all because i was weirdly "afraid" of her. she did the back and forth between love bombing and neglect, and i was so frazzled and insecure. (3)

reflecting, i don't know what it was about our friendship that kept me. no substance. but then again, i am much more loving toward myself than i was then, and less desperate for affection and acceptance. i was an insecure little thing when we met, and i wanted so badly to be accepted. i don't know if my ex friend recognized it, but i can empathize with what harry is recieving from meghan, and i know how he will feel when this is all over. i know we say he'll be saved by dad, and he will. (4)

but i also know harry will feel deep shame, at least i did. the friends who i didn't treat well, they all understood, and were happy to have me "back" (although i never left physically). they told me they knew that wasn't me, they saw who i was when she wasn't around us, and at times they were worried for me around her. after, they did all they could to "protect" me from her because they knew the power she held over me. i still felt terrible, and still do to this day. (5)

_______________________________________________________________________

Thanks for sharing, anon. I’m sorry you had to go through that. From what I’ve read of narcissists they are really destructive in an insidious way.

That may very well be what Harry is going through, and maybe I should be more sympathetic. It’s just that given how quickly the relationship developed and all the institutional protections he swept away, I...I don’t know. I just don’t feel particularly sympathetic. 

If he’d had a longer engagement, or a quieter wedding, or waited to have a child, or in anyway acted in a halfway responsible manner, I would feel more sympathy. As it stands though, it just doesn’t feel like she had to be very manipulative or Machiavellian to basically get him to wreck his family and his country. I mean, he put out a public statement on palace letterhead after only a few dates. It really does seem to me that he was happy to torch the place.

[the-maxrecords-blog]

where the wild things went

Vice: Hello Max. This is your first film in five years. What on earth have you been doing with your time?

Max: Just living, you know? Living, going to school, getting done with school.

Vice: Did you ever worry, "Hang on, what if I've forgotten how to act"?

Max: I didn't really think about it until the first day or two shooting then I was like, "What the fuck am I doing here?". For the first couple of days the learning curve was pretty steep again.

Vice: How does one even go about preparing to play a sociopath? Presumably it wasn't method acting.

Max: I kind of feel like there is no such thing as acting that isn't method to some degree because if you're not actually experiencing it, then you're a fucking liar. I was talking with Billy [O'Brien - director] about it and - I forget the word that he keeps using - but it's an intuitive process. You just kind of feel it out, you know? I was pretty miserable while we were shooting, just because you're in a super dark brain space all day. Especially living in a place like Minnesota where we were shooting, six days a week. You don't get the opportunity to turn it off, you know? And that's great as far as the actual creative process goes but it sucks as far as trying to be a person.

Vice: Have you ever done a psychopath test?

Max: I don't think so.

Vice: Would you like to do one?

Max: Yeah, let's do it! Is it legit or is it some Facebook nonsense?

Vice: Oh, Facebook nonsense probably.

Max: So you're not licensed?

Vice: We're not unlicensed.

Max: I'm pretty sure it's an either-or thing.

Vice: So there are eight statements. You either agree or disagree. First one: "You rarely catch me making any plans. I'm far too spontaneous".

Max: Yeah, absolutely.

Vice: "If I got a better offer, I wouldn't mind cancelling longstanding plans".

Max: Yeah, that's probably true.

Vice: "It would be fun to drive fast cars, ride rollercoasters or go skydiving".

Max: I've been skydiving. Fast cars are fun. I don't get the appeal of rollercoasters. I guess I haven't really done a true roller coaster. It feels artificial.

Vice: Shall we disagree?

Max: No, let's agree.

Vice: Alright. "I think it's okay to step over other people to achieve my ambitions".

Max: I don't know. I don't think you necessarily need to it. I can't think of many situations that I've been in where that's necessary, where there isn't some other course of action you could take. Let's disagree.

Vice: Do you have an ambition?

Max: In the broader context of my life, I just want to gain skills. Recently I was doing an outdoor programme back in the States through this thing called NOLS [National Outdoor Leadership School], so I was off doing that for a couple of months. Getting better at being outdoors and learning how the natural world works. And I love playing music so getting better at that. Just learning to be a better, more competent person. Trying to not be a dick.

Vice: It's a good motto. Okay: "I'm very persuasive and getting people to get what I want is a real talent of mine".

Max: Agree! I think I'm pretty good at that. I've been manipulating my parents for years.

Vice: The perks of being a child star... What was that whole experience like?

Max: Really awful! Especially for children, the film world is just terrible. You can't grow up in that world and still have a connection to reality. At least if you're, like, really in it. Especially the poor folks out there who have stage parents. It's just so sheltered. The creative aspect of acting is one of the more amazing things that I've gotten to experience but everything outside of that is pretty bizarre.

Vice: Was it enough to make you think you might not want to do it anymore?

Max: I think, probably, yeah. Especially once Where the Wild Things Are came out. And that was my first real acting role too. Being thrown in the deep end as a young, pretty vulnerable person. And then you have an experience like that and there's all this stigma around it, back in the "real world". I went to the same school since I was in second grade, through most of high school, and I knew all these kids and they were my friends before and after but there was, coming back, this weird stigma, these weird assumptions that if you're in a film, you're an asshole and you don't exist in a grounded real world way.

Vice: What are your memories of working on that film?

Max: It was really important to Spike that the set was conducive to a child. So we had a million kids on set. All the crew was kind of invited to bring their families. And as a way to kind of understand the vibe that Spike wanted to cultivate, there was always music on set. The Smiths, Cemetery Gates and Big Mouth Strikes Again, all those songs. I have really wonderful nine-year-old memories of romping around on set and that music playing.

Vice: How does one move past an experience like that and into the world of adult acting?

Max: I think you just grow up and learn to be a person. I think one of the biggest learning curves for me, as a result of those experiences and then applying that to the real world, was that it took me a long time to learn to take a compliment. From twelve through to however old, you just kind of shut down. There's this assumption of an agenda. But you grow up and you learn to be a person and you temper the experiences of working in the film world with what people are actually like and you balance that.

Vice: Is there one thing you know now that you wish you knew then?

Max: No, I don't think so. I am the person I am as a result of a lot of those experiences and I love the people that I met and especially those people that I have experiences with. It is what it is. Can't change the past!

Vice: Okay: "My ability to make quick decisions means that I would suit a dangerous job".

Max: [Takes long time to decide answer] I dunno... The idea of being a smokejumper appeals to me.

Vice: What's a smokejumper?

Max: It's a term for the folks in the US that are forest firefighters and jump out of airplanes. That appeals to me.

Vice: What do you think you'd be doing if you weren't acting?

Max: Working in outdoor education probably. Working with kids or being in the outdoors. Or both.

Vice: Do you have a desire to keep acting?

Max: Yeah. I mean, I like doing it and I think creatively it's really cool and the people you get the opportunities to work with are often really wonderful people. It allows me to do other things in my own life. My parents have kind of helped me gain this perspective of it, but I think it's best for me to view it as a hobby. I like acting but I don't think it's healthy to do films back to back.

Vice: What was it about this script?

Max: I love Billy and I love Nick Ryan, the producer. I love Robbie Ryan, our cinematographer and I think, aesthetically, just the, Midwest middle America vibe, that's really cool. And the humour of the script. It's genuine and it has real emotion embedded in it but it's funny! That Fargo humour really appeals to me.

Vice: Do you have a favourite movie?

Max: It changes periodically, of course. Birdman has been one of my favourite films ever. It came out a couple of years ago and I've watched it half a dozen times. The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover. I rewatched that pretty recently and remembered how good it was. People keep talking to me about Donnie Darko in relation to this film and I like that one quite a bit.

Vice:"When others are crumbling under pressure, I'm usually the one with a cool head". Agree or disagree?

Max: Yes. I think so.

Vice: When was was the last time you lost your cool?

Max: I've been working on that skill and I think I'm getting pretty good at it. It's been awhile since I've been genuinely, deeply upset about something. One of my favourite things in the world is this scar right here [shows us a fairly impressive scar on his knuckle]. I got it punching walls. It was like the perfect teenage angst motivation. The first time, I was really upset in my house because I had read something about the use of American drone warfare and just how upsetting it was and how a bunch of civilians had just been murdered somewhere in the world. And then the second time was me being upsetting at my parents.

Vice: Alright, last one: "I'm rarely to blame for things going wrong, it's usually the fault of the people around me".

Max: I mean, yeah. But I'll disagree.

Vice: Okay, let's see your results… You're 61% psychopath! "Though your conscience is in the right place, you have a pragmatic streak and generally aren't afraid to do your own dirty work".

Max: I'll take that.

Vice: There's more! "You're no shrinking violet but you're no daredevil either. You generally have a little trouble seeing things from other people's perspectives, but at the same time you're no pushover. Everything in moderation, including moderation, might sum up your approach to life".

Max: I like that. I'll take it!

Credits: Vice.com

Source: https://i-d.vice.com/en_gb/topic/max-records